kimmel: 'kim k the biggest threat to america' - my dog ate meat absorbent pads
Prior to the White House press dinner on Saturday night, ringingtonlinsay Lohan may have received more attention than any other guest, but Kim Kardashian is the annual event from dais
For example, host Jimmy Kimmel remembered last year's dinner, which was held after President Obama sent a team to track down and kill bin Laden.
"If you're looking for the biggest threat to the United States right now, she's there," he pointed to the audience . ".
"She's Kim Kardashian. As reality-
The TV star smiled and Kimmel scolded the president.
"When you took office, there was only one reality show in the Kardashians," he said . "
"Now they have four.
This is not a good trend.
But Kimmel saved his best ammo for Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney: "When I think of Mitt Romney, I don't think Etch-a-Sketch.
I thought of the tornado: Red 1 feet, Blue 1, Green 2.
Rick Santorum: "I don't think it's Rick's year.
Rick's year is 1954.
Ron Paul: "For me, Ron Paul looks like someone who doesn't wear a headscarf at the end of each episode, Kubi do.
Newt Gingrich: "It's great to be able to see the couple here tonight, because I think that means the check has been settled.
About the Republican Party: "I think Abraham Lincoln has a vision for the development of the Republican Party after 150," he said. "he shot himself.
Ridicule for Kardashian
This also includes Kimmel's suggestion that Obama disguised himself as the Denver Nuggets Navy SEAL Team Six outside Beverly Hills's Kardashian compound, "so they can be undiscovered.
In the comic 20-
The minute monologue is mostly political, a little more than the critics of the Republican Party.
As for the guest's own remarks, President Obama may not bite like he did last year when he was following Donald Trump's guests as he kept asking questions about the Obama birth certificate.
Maybe the happiest thing he laughed at was that he himself and the one that was recently dug up.
From his autobiography "My father's dream", Tan Bai said that he ate dog meat in Indonesia when he was a child.
"What's the difference between hockey mom and bulldog? ” he asked.
"The bulldog is delicious.
This time, the president-
He attends his annual dinner during his tenure every year.
Some of his sharpest lines were used in pre-recorded opening clips, in which his voice was heard from "backstage" and the microphone was allegedly on.
His goals include, yes, Kim Kardashian.
"Seriously, guys, what am I doing here?
Obama told an invisible aide.
"I'm the president of the United States. I'm opening for Jimmy Kimmel?
Why should I tell you?
Are you kidding Kim Kardashian?
Anyway, what is she famous?
For WHCD, the audience is usually different, including Lohan, Kardashian, George Clooney, Steven pilberg, Kevin Spacey, and Glee, along with many politicians and Washington insiders.
Or, as Kimmel said, "there's a room here where we have media members, politicians, corporate executives, advertisers, celebrities . . . . . . All the problems in America are here tonight.
For the host of the dinner at the Hilton Washington, DC, this is a minefield.
The event was displayed too-
The close relationship between the White House and the people who reported it.
But when the host was acting too rough, it was also attacked, as some thought Stephen Colbert did in 2006, when his comments led to several Bush administration
The Journalists Association's response was to book a fairly creakier Rich Little in the second year, the first time comic imitators have hosted a dinner since the Reagan administration.
Since then, Craig Ferguson, Wanda Sykes, Jay Renault, and Seth Meyers have all performed.
Kimmel continues the tradition of blaming the chief executive for sitting only a few feet away, mocking the compromises Obama made and the disappointment some supporters felt.
"He guided us through some very difficult times and paid a heavy price for it," Kimmel said . ".
"People like President Obama have a term.
Maybe not two terms, but one.
Kimmel later pointed out that the dog who starred in "The Artist" was a guest, adding, "Uggie can turn over under orders.
He's a Democrat.
He also stabbed conservative commentator Rush Limbaugh with a knife (
"The difference between Bill Mach and rush Limburg for the right wing is that the person watching Bill Mach knows he's a jerk ")
Then, when the Republicans said he had a new theory, and actually John Wilks Booth did not assassinate Abraham Lincoln, he made a big accusation against him.
In his own speech, President Obama took a moderate approach to his opponent, starting with how many members of Congress he noticed were present.
"I 've been trying to be civilized and not take any cheap photos," he said . " "That's why I want to thank all the Members who took a break from their tired schedule and they didn't come here tonight by any law.
After mentioning the Hilton Grand Ballroom
"Or, as Mitt Romney said, a little repairman --upper” —
He congratulated the Huffington Post on winning the Pulitzer Prize.
"Arianna, you deserve it," he said to founder Arianna Huffington . ".
"No one else can link to that hard one.
Huffington Post reports the news every day.
The president also revealed that conspiracy theorists believe it is right that he is ready to release a secret agenda if he wins a second term.
In the item on the agenda, he said: "In my first term, I sang Al Green.
In my second term, I will go with Young Jeezy . . . . . . In my first term, we abolished what was called "Don't ask, don't tell . "
In my second term, we will replace it with a policy called "Rain Man.
At the end of the speech, both Kimmel and Obama paid tribute to the media, and the president said that "a free media that is not afraid of challenges and criticism" is one of the traditions that makes us bigger than the challenges we face.
Kimmel said at the end of the night, "If we really want to overcome the problems we face, we have to work together.
Whether you're black, like President Obama, or white, like President Obama, or red, like President Obama's agenda.
Then he mentioned a score.
School teacher, Sir.
Mills predicted that Kimmel would not be of any value.
"I'm getting high --
Five presidents of the United States, "he said. “Eat it, Mills.